they dont do sh!t about it to the guys. just a heads up...mine abused me severely and it took my family paying someone to move me away to get me outta the situation. i had went to the army seeking help 3 times and each time they accuseed me that i was infact crazy. mean bastards..
they tried convincing me that i would ruin his carrer. man f his carreer if he wants to put his hands on me. sneaky freaks. they really need to change up the way spousal abuse is handled. i can see why there are so many dead wives @ campbell.
They never do anything at Ft campbell, My ex husband threatened to kill my son who was 18 months at the time, threatened my lil sister who was like 9 as well as threatened to burn down military property. He threatened all of this in front of his 1st sgt and they did nothing. Then when i took them a copy of the protection order i was informed they would use it to line the floors for the dogs!
I am glad to hear you are safe..., I feel sorry you and girls that you had to go threw any of this.:( Spousal abuse is wrong and not acceptable in my book.
Unfortunately, there are wives that lie about abuse to "get back" at their husbands or are attempting for full and sole custody ( i have seen just about every method used from abuse to the soldier touched my child when it was used for that). Divorces are pretty ugly. In many years of experience as a military wife, I have seen both, where there was physical and mental abuse, as well manipulating wives. Unfortunately, the ones that need help, do not get it.
I will say this, some will agree, some won't, but will say it anyways....I am merely saying this on a practical stand point.
The military isn't responible for every aspect of the soldier's life. Unless you have a court order for support, protection or whatever, they can not or will not, do anything, or order them to do anything. Command has no legal obligation to do anything. Harsh.. yes, but reality. They are not referrees, marriage councelors or financial advisors. Doing things in court through attorneys is the proper way to do things. Yes, there are husbands that are a-holes, abusers and scum. However, getting them in trouble only leads to them getting kicked out... what does that do the spouse? Nothing. It just gets the soldier chaptered out. No career, no job, no child support and no insurance for the kids in a very uncertain time in the economy isn't what the spouse needs in addition to stress of divorce. If this was the civilian world, you couldn't go to his boss and ask for help. They don't have any more authority to do anything, any more then the Chain of Command does. Unless you walk in with your face black and blue to the Chaplin or your FRG and ask for help... it is a private matter. If it is a He Said/She Said thing, they will take the side of the soldier if he has a good reputation in the Company he is attached to. If he has been a douche and they see it, know it and now have a reason to get him chaptered. However.. then who is going to pay for the next ( up-to) 18 years of child support and health care?
Practical thinking. Not emotional.
Let me state again.. I am totally against spousal abuse. I think anyone that is abusive should have their hands cut off so they won't do ever hurt a woman or child ever again.
Just be happy that you are safe and away. Save the knife throwing for the custody hearing and document everything from this moment forward. Keep everything to written form ( be firm but nice and let him shoot himself in the face with words- then hit print and hand to your attorney )and don't forget to monitor his facebook and take anything that pertains to him off yours. Type in divorce and facebook in google and you get an idea of what I am talking about. Attorneys don't need to hire private investigators.. social media accounts do it all for them :)
"acting" meek after being empowered enough to walk away allows you to let him be a buttmunch, rant and rave and you can build a case against him with evidence. He will think he is control.. when infact you are.